Analogy of My Love
by Falcon Strife
Summary: -Oneshot- Manta writes about his feelings towards his life and a particular shaman. Onesided MantaxYoh.


Analogy Of My Love  
  
I remember a time when I felt like this.  
Do you know what feeling it is?  
  
In my family, I was considered a man of two months, but perhaps I had been a man for longer. I never had a childhood or friends. Only a long training course and co-workers. Each day ran the same way. Wake up. Eat. Study. Eat. Study. Work. Eat. Study. Go to sleep. No questions were ever asked, because that's all there was time for. Anything else was a waste of the precious time one could never seem to have enough of.  
But I suppose I was one of the weak links, because even though my family and peers were satisfied, I was unfulfilled. It felt as if doing the things I was supposed to do, were actually the things that were wasting those hours, minutes, seconds of the day. I remembered once I tried to break the cycle, but in return I was punished for wasting not only my own time, but the time of those around me. It was that experience that made me immune to those who chose to break the cycle.  
I never thought again about breaking away.  
Instead I focussed on an alternative to overcome the emptiness in my life. After all, one's life cannot be empty, if there is no life.  
  
However, on the night I would overcome that terrible feeling, I became distracted. Something called me. Something I hadn't vaccinated myself against. But how could I have prevented it? The teachings of those around me clearly stated that such an malady didn't exist, but you proved them wrong.  
Then you pulled me into what I believed was a delusion. I became obsessed with trying to prove you wrong, not even noticing how the emptiness that had plagued me for so long was finally beginning to heal. I didn't realize it then that you were my cure.  
I began to crave my cure. I had become afraid that if we parted, that plague would return, and I would be unable to cure it again. Strange how you became to me, what tobacco must be to a smoker. And of course I was punished for my longing by my co-workers. But I couldn't help it.  
  
You were the missing piece of the puzzle.  
You were the missing ray from the sun.  
Dare I say... you were the missing love in a Shakespearian play?  
  
I like that analogy. You became my Romeo.  
You were outgoing. I was timid.  
Your family was traditional and natural. My family was modern and artificial.  
You played with the spirits. I worked with the living.  
I'd like to think that I was your Juliette, but you already had your Cleopatra. And she wasn't even from a Shakespearian production. I guess it would be so, when your life chose a different play.  
  
But I still had your attention. You would make me smile. I think I made you smile as well. You hurt me to protect me, and I believe I did so too. We faced things together, even when we were apart. You never let the demons get me, and I hope that I had never let them win.  
  
But...  
Nothing lasts forever.  
  
The lily of our friendship begins to wilt. You were the roots of me, and you were violently torn from my sensitive stem. The demon consumed you, taking you from the light, and left me to die, returning me to endless night.  
But I was wrong.  
Our lily was now fully bloomed. Nothing could stop us from showing the beauty of what we had. And in the short time I had left, I was able to show them what you truly meant.  
But the roots were still torn, even if they were returned to the water.  
  
Now I can see that my heart's plague will overcome my cure's healing.  
  
Now I can see that my Romeo will die only for his Cleopatra.  
Now I can see that my roots will nurture another lily.  
And my sanity slips away with each passing moment.  
  
My cure can no longer heal me.  
My Romeo belongs to his Cleopatra.  
My roots give life to another blossom.  
Thus, I have returned to step one.  
  
I am dying of a terrible plague.  
I am dying of heart break.  
I am dying of lack of nourishment.  
And I long for the day when my suffering ends.  
  
~  
  
"Manta," Yoh's voice cooed softly.  
Manta blinked, then closed the diary quickly while looking up. "Y-Yoh- kun?"  
Yoh smiled. "What are you writing?"  
"Uh... Well..." He looked down quietly.  
"Oh, it's private diary stuff, huh? Okay then," he said with a smile, then gently hugged his small friend. "I'll leave you be."  
Manta watched quietly as Yoh left, then looked down with a sigh.  
  
~  
  
Yes, I long for the day when my suffering will come to an end...  
But...  
There is still light...  
So maybe...  
Just in case...  
I can...  
I will...  
  
I will fight my plague.  
I will love my Romeo.  
I will live on my remaining nutrients.  
For you I will hold on.  
  
That is the analogy of my love. 


End file.
